I filled some people in on where BD and I stand as of now but I figured it deserved a quick blog post about it as well.
On our way to the club last week, he forced me to tell him about being mad and my feeling towards Sally. So when we talked on the phone last week, we finished that conversation and laid everything out on the table. I told him how I felt like he lied to me and here I was, worried that he was still sick but instead he was off with some girl! He realized he was wrong and apologized and he also said he wanted to tell me why he wouldnt go out with me. And as much as its going to come off as such a line, it was truly a very touching moment and we both teared up over the phone.
He told me a story about this girl hes been friends with for 20 years and how they use to be really really close. Well they had kissed once and it was ultra awkward and it really made things weird for them for a while. Well long story short, he came down to just saying that I really meant alot to him and he doesnt know what he would do if he lost me in his life. He actually choked out that sentence and I lost it, tears just streaming down my cheeks. And I totally get it, I think he was sincere and ever since then, we've been more than okay.
We then spent the rest of our 2.5hr conversation just laughing at one another, discussing mutual friends of ours, and even treading into the world of Sally and AP (our new date people.) Hes actually really excited about AP. Now its like we're sharing our journey into the world of dating with one another and I kinda like it. Sally is really worried I dont like her and Im glad she respects that my opinion of her is really important to BD. BD is chomping at the bit to meet AP but gah, I have only hung out with him once, BD is gonna have to wait his turn!! We actually have a bet: loser of the bet buys the first pitcher of beer on Sun when we go to watch football. And the bet is, that AP calls to make a date before the 2nd game we watch on Sunday. I say hes not going to call and make a plan but BD is playing Team AP and thinks it will happen. We'll see.
Now to my date with AP. :sigh: I think I like the guy but I refuse to get all giddy and excited about him-- it just leads to setting yourself up to get hurt. We've agreed to take it slow and nothing too frisky until a few dates in but I have to say hes a good kisser. We went to dinner (which was delicious!) and I could tell we were both awkward but trying to work past it. I admitted that this was really only my 3rd date EVER and he thought it over and admitted it was only his 4th really. He was married for 10 years! And the last 6 he said he was just staying with his ex because he felt like it was the right thing to do. But one morning he woke up and realized he just didnt love her anymore and the fighting they were doing in front of their son wasnt helping anyone. He was unhappy, the ex was unhappy, and he didnt want their son to grow up thinking this is what a married relationship was suppose to be like. So hes been separated for 8 months and officially divorced for 3 weeks. Im only the 2nd date post divorce.
After dinner, we went to his favorite bar to get some drinks and play pool. I actually drove because the smart guy that AP is, doesnt like to drink and drive and his plan was to take a taxi during our date. Not having drank anything yet, I offered to drive. It gave me a tiny bit of control and it was really no big deal to drive. At the bar, I spanked him in 4/5 games of pool and things got super flirty. Im not one for PDA but being it was a first date and I really liked his kisses, I let them happen. After playing an older English guy (and winning) we gave up our pool table and he asked if I wanted to go to the beach. Oh!! And while at the bar, we played music and although our tastes dont seem to be a perfect match, he was familiar with DCFC which is MEGA win with me!
At the beach we did the whole hand-holding, beach walk thing. It was a full moon so we could really enjoy the waves and cool feeling of the sand beneath us. We sat down to enjoy the stars and a little making out ensued. At one point he pulled back and said, "this actually scares me a bit. I really like you but I cant get hurt again. I dont wanna screw this up." I just told him that we could take it slow, I like him so far, and have no intention of hurting him. Of course you can tell people this a million times but its still a scary moment when you feel yourself starting to really like someone else. I felt it too but hide it relatively well. I refuse to be hurt again, I just cant do it again. We both got worked up enough to wanna go back to his place, but I could hear Robin in my head "not until the 3rd date!" so I refused.
I told him I hated making him leave and then he stopped...looked at me...and said "you think if you come home with me, that I wont call you again. That I would just use you and youre afraid." Whoa, AP just totally called my ass out like that! And to be honest...he was right. I didnt want it to just be some random hookup and that was my biggest fear going into the date. So I told him to surprise me. Be the nice guy who treats a girl well, is really sweet, and is the type to call again.
He called me right when I got home.
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